Saturday, July 2, 2016
A lot of life has happened in the last four years, mostly health issues. I had a neck fusion that led from one thing to another. I had a disc that was dangerously close to my spinal cord and one fall or accident could sever my spinal cord. I had no choice in the matter but to have surgery, it was a "have to" thing. But it left me with terrible headaches that I never experienced before. In the process of all this the doctor found out I had 4 herniated disks causing my leg to give out on me. My days are filled with chronic pain. It's been a battle both physically and spiritually. During this time, I've stayed close to the Lord, but I must confess some days I wondered where He was. There were two things I tried to do everyday...have a quiet time sitting at the Lord's feet and making dinner for Bob....even if it was simple. I didn't always accomplish this, but it was my goal.
My husband went part time a year ago which has really been nice. He works three days a week which is just perfect. It gets him out among people and keeps us with full medical benefits. It's been a big change I will admit but, it's worked out perfectly at a time I needed help.
I've missed blogging. In this battle I've been in, I wasn't sure that I had much to offer in words of encouragement. I feel the tug in my heart to try again. It's not easy and most of the time impossible to put into words the deeper things that God is doing in us. Pain can change people. I pray for His glory that I've changed for the better.
Blessings, my friends!
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
As I write just simple sentences of gratitude and count my blessings every day...the Lord encourages me. David sought encouragement from the Lord in 1 Samuel 30:6. God waits for us so He can encourage us in this journey called life. He loves to encourage us. We have to learn how to recognize it when He whispers encouragement to us.
If the simplest of words can discourage... then the simplest of words can encourage as well. I want to be an encourager, don't you? Thank you, dear hearts, for your words of encouragement!
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
OBEDIENCE is a big word. For each of us it can mean something different. The obedience that God requires of me may be different for you. Some things are black and white for any follower of Jesus Christ. There are no gray areas for those things He commands us to do from His Word. Some things are black and white and others are the whispers of God that we know are meant just for us. I want to hear and obey the whispers as well as the commandments.
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
I found myself stepping out into areas that were totally out of my comfort zone. God stretched me in some areas, giving me the gentle nudges I needed..at times I felt like they were more like a shove off a cliff...but all in all...He stretched me and I didn't break!
Friday, November 12, 2010
The key verse for the entire series was, Job 23:10. "But He knows the way I take, and when He has tried me, I shall come forth as gold."
I gleaned so much from these teachings and as I sort through my notes and thoughts I will share some of those things here on my blog. The point I wanted to share today is some of Pastor James' thoughts and mine, on trials and consequences.
One definition of a trial is....A painful circumstance allowed by God to change our conduct and our character." Our trials are designed to change us. God wants change in us and through us and every trial we face is allowed by God for our ultimate good. In the midst of trials it's hard to remember that ultimately God has a plan. Jeremiah 29:11 says, He knows the plans He has for us. He knows.
God also knows that sometimes we aren't always ready for His plan and the refining process of trials shapes us so we are ready for His "ultimate plan".
When we go through hard times we can be so quick to call it a trial, when in all reality it is a consequence to sin. A person who cheats on their income tax and then is audited and has their wages garnished says..I don't know how I am going to pay my bills. I am in the worst trial of my life. Is it a consequence or a trial? It's a consequence. The sin doesn't have to be big....but there are consequences to all sin. What we say and what we do can lead to consequences that disguise themselves as a trial.
How do we make it through our trials? We want to be trained by the trial so we surrender, trust, obey and abide, praying that we will come forth as gold when it ends. Some trials go on a long time, some are short. Most trials are normally for a season. Some longer seasons than others. We need staying power in the midst of a trial. Don't quit...don't give up, trials produce transformation. Bear up under it.
How do we get out of a consequence? Repent. Repent for our actions and behavior. Some of what we have sown will not automatically be gone. The residue from sin lingers. Freedom comes from repentance. Take necessary steps to right a wrong.
These are just a few of my thoughts today. In a time when it seems Christians are in the heat of so many trials, maybe we should ask ourselves...
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
My concerns seem to be multiplied lately, as I am sure many of you feel the same way. I find such comfort in knowing that the things that concern me, concern God. Since He can do the impossible, and nothing is too hard for Him...then as I submit to His will, His desires, lay my concerns at His feet, I can have confidence that He is working for good those things that concern me. I encourage you to be comforted knowing that even in the midst of your concern, God is working.
God is Sovereign ....it's something we all need to remember.... that whatever our circumstances, He is in control and not one thing comes as a surprise to Him. Things can hit us and knock the wind right out of us and drop us flat on our behinds....and all the time God must be thinking, "I've got you..I've never dropped you before and I won't drop you now."
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Have you ever seen a chameleon? If you look closely you can see this little guy in the picture. Chameleon's can change their color in less than 20 seconds to blend in with their surroundings. I've heard the expression. " they are whatever color they're sitting on." It certainly applies to these little critters, but when I heard this saying the first time, it was making reference to "people".
Some people find themselves being more spiritual in one surrounding, then not so spiritual in another surrounding....change of color. Another example would be...you tell the person you are with what you think they want to hear and another person what they want to hear....change of color. You do things with one group of friends that you would never do with another group of friends...color change again.
A consistent walk with Jesus...walking in the Spirit...will prevent any of us from turning "whatever color we are sitting on." Oh how I desire that the only color I want others to see, is the reflection of Jesus in me... in whatever circumstance and whatever company I find myself in. You too?
Monday, September 20, 2010
"...inwardly we are being renewed day by day."
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Where does time go? It's been so long since I have posted on my blogs. I was posting so much and then I guess I hit a wall. My husband was home for two weeks on vacation. Actually two separate weeks with a week in between. On the off weeks, I had a root canal..a root canal reversal and a root canal...all on the same tooth and I am not done yet!
Our church had a spring tea on May 1st and that was a big undertaking. I gave a 15 minute sharing on The Joys of Journaling. I also was a table hostess and was responsible for setting up my own table. The theme was In The Garden..I'll share some pictures in my next post.
Summer's can be so hot here in S. California.....I usually have some summer projects to work on. So I have been thinking what to do...as the A/C hums away. It's not hot yet and I am loving it. We may actually have rain this week...that is not normal for S. California..at all.
Patty's Pantry has been deglected too. I never did get all my recipes reposted after I lost my blogs a couple years ago...two fingered typists type slow...:) For Mother's day I was given, Martha Stewart's Cupcake cookbook,which is terrific.....oh nummy, I'll have to post some of those when I try them!
It's been one of the roughest years I can remember health wise...But I always look for a better day tomorrow and that's what keeps me going. When looking to Jesus He will always show me something good for each day. He is so faithful!
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
And He shall strengthen your heart;
Wait, I say, on the LORD!
Monday, April 19, 2010
This is my paraphrase of a story Pastor Raul told in church yesterday. I have heard it before and this may not be word for word what he said...but you'll get the meaning.
A little girl and her father were going somewhere in the car. She was standing up on the seat and he told her to sit down and put her seat belt on. She continued to stand as he started to drive away. He told her again to sit down and put her seat belt on...she continued to stand. He pulled the car over sat her down and fastened her seat belt. As he drove away, he looked in his rear view mirror, she looked at him and said, " In my heart, I am still standing!"
When our Heavenly Father asks us to do something it is for our own good. Sometimes we kick and scream in our hearts that we don't want to do that thing He's asked of us. We go ahead and obey and we do it..but like this little girl, in our hearts we are still standing. We went through the motions of being obedient and on the outside it looks as if we were...but the heart attitude was one of rebellion.
I have learned and am still learning that we just can't go through the motions of obedience. We aren't fooling any one but ourselves when we do. God knows the motives of our hearts..He knows if the action of obedience is sincere and the motives are right. Take this sentence, worded the same way..but with different attitudes.
I'll go Lord, only because You want me to go. The heart attitude is I will go Lord, I may not want to, but I will go because You know what's best and I want to be obedient to what you have asked.
I'll go Lord, only because you want me to. The heart attitude is I'm going but only because I have to go because You want me to go, not because I want to go.
The first response is a humble response, one of surrender..the other response is one with selfish attitude. A response with rebellion.
One of these attitudes is the heart is still standing in the back seat. Oh my goodness, how many times have we had this attitude?
The attitude of our hearts has so much to do with everything we do..well, it actually has All to do, with everything we do. It not only applies to how we respond to the Lord but applies in every situation in our life. What is my heart attitude? Is it surrendered or rebellious?
We live in trying times and can be surrounded by trying people. It has to be a daily, minute by minute decision to have an attitude that is pure and motivated only by our love and obedience to the Lord.
This is my attitude of the heart story....
Things were coming at me like ocean waves a couple years back. I felt like I was rolling with the punches pretty good. It was one medical test after another and a year of continual ear infections. I started to get a little overwhelmed. I wanted to have the right attitude so I would say,"Whatever, Lord." I'd be laying there having another ultra sound and again I would say, "Whatever, Lord." I thought I was being surrendered...NOPE. It was my way of handling the situation for the moment, but it was far from having a surrendered attitude to God in my circumstances. Need I say, I quit saying "whatever." Not my will, but Yours Father," is the desire I have for my heart attitude now. I try never to say, "Whatever" anymore because no matter how I use it...it's an attitude!
My challenge to all of us today is...
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
There were some hard lessons through the years, but God taught me and worked with me to see that I was of value to Him just because I was His Daughter. I still can fall into the Enemy's trap of wanting to be loved and feel like I have to do things to earn it. When that happens, the Lord will prick my heart and remind me that I don't have to do that because love should be given freely.
Poor Leah, she was never loved they way that she desired. She wasn't a perfect woman she certainly did many deceitful things. She reminds me of the woman who is unlovely, difficult to love, the woman who is always left out.. the underdog. The kind of woman who always strives to be loved and yet is always on the outside looking in. These are the kinds of women that always touch my heart and I find myself drawn to them.
Oh, please if you find that I have described you in this post won't you please realize that you are of value and you are LOVED because you are a Daughter of the Most High God...He created you!
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Genesis 21 is the story of Hagar and the strife between her and Abrahams's wife Sarah. Hagar was the mother of Abraham's son Ishmael, born in a concubine. Sarah insisted that Abraham send them away becausehe didn't want Ishmael to share in Abraham's inheritance. Hagar and her teenage son headed for the desert. When I think of our deserts here in California I am sure it had to be scary being out there all alone. When Hagar thought they were about to die because they needed water, God opened her eyes and she saw a well. He could have provided a spring, but He wanted her to open her eyes to show her what had been already provided.
God is always with us, He was with Hagar in the desert...His provision was already there..she only needed to open her eyes!
"The question is not if God will prove Himself faithful to you,
~Dr. David Jeremiah~
Friday, March 26, 2010
Thursday, March 25, 2010
My reading this morning was in Genesis 18. Verse 14 says, "Is anything too hard for the Lord?" The Lord was reminding Abraham and Sarah that He had promised them a son. As I thought about this verse it came to me, that at times I think things are impossible. Why do I think these things are impossible? I think it's because in my human thoughts and reasoning and in my human strength...they are impossible. Luke 1 :37 tell us, "For nothing will be impossible with God."
If we know God is asking something of us...then He will equip us, enable us, and give us strength...When we rely on and depend on Him, we can see the impossible happen before our very eyes. Yes, we have to do our part, but we are also told that we can do all things in Christ who gives us strength.
I am going to take a page in my prayer journal today and write at the top of the page, "Nothing Is Too Hard For GOD." I am going to list the things that I have felt were impossible, or things I have given up on, or even things I feel God wants me to do... and commit them to prayer.
How about you? Have you felt that there are things in your life that are impossible? Take a few minutes today, sit a spell and reflect on these words, " Is anything too hard for the Lord?"
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
"I'm convinced that there is nothing that can happen to me in this life that is not precisely designed by a sovereign Lord to give me the opportunity to learn to know Him."
Monday, March 22, 2010
Edited new thought; What I think the author of this quote means..or I should say what this quote means to me is, If God is asking us to change, at times there is pain involved, if we choose not to change, then we can suffer pain the way we are. I just happened to like this quote, not necessarily all that this author teaches.
Friday, March 19, 2010
God is always at work changing us. We should never get comfortable anywhere. We have to adapt where He places us and trust Him in new surroundings and circumstances. I have been married to the same man 40 years, lived in the same house for 39 and have had the same best friend for 45 years. See, why change might be hard? LOL
In an ever changing world, the Lord who is unchanging, is my rock of stability... I want change in my life, but I only want the changes that God allows or desires of me.
So many of you have such big changes in your lives...mine are minimal. And for that I am thankful. The only change that comes easy for me is...changing my mind. (:
I just wanted to let you all know I am still here...things going on with doctors and such...I get a bunch of biopsy reports back on my stomach next Thursday..any little prayer would be so appreciated.
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
"Jesus is life, Girlfriends, Jesus if Life. Let's run after Him with every ounce of energy we have."~Beth Moore~
I've asked myself so many times what am I running after. In years past, I remember running every day working for Jesus and each day got busier and busier. One day many years ago, I realized that all the different ministries I was involved in kept me so busy that I didn't have time for Jesus. I have always been involved in a women's study, but to me that wasn't necessarily sitting at His feet sharing intimacy with Him.
I learned a very valuable lesson..it isn't so much what God wanted me to DO for him, but it's what He wanted me to BE. Doing and being both take energy..and at different seasons in our lives, God may ask us to do more for Him. God is always asking us to BE..Be in love with Him, Be in His Word, Be at His feet, Be hopeful, Be merciful, Be everything Jesus sets the example to BE.
Running after Jesus with every ounce of energy that I have, means being careful and being wise on how I use my energy. A friend of mine who also has chronic illnesses, says she has a teaspoon of energy with a cup full of things to do. That's how I feel...and if I didn't already have a cup full of things to do..there's plenty more things I dream of doing.
If you find yourself in this place today...Seek first His Kingdom...and run after Jesus with all the energy that you have. Run after Him and then you'll know what things He wants you to DO. But always remember..He always wants You to..BE!
Friday, February 26, 2010
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Sometimes life does seem like it is unraveling when things hit us one thing right after another. Today in our world many people find themselves frustrated and discouraged when circumstances of life begin to tear apart and unravel every thing they have known.
I get frustrated when my knitting starts to unravel because I was careless how I put my needles down. I want to throw it in my knitting basket, rather than take my time and put the stitches back on the needle. I watch it unravel and I feel helpless.
We aren't helpless and can't throw in the towel when our lives unravel...we have to go on. God's Word always stands strong, it will always encourage, always refresh, always direct, always comfort us. Whatever our need is, God's Word will hold strong amidst the greatest difficulties that life can bring. All we have to do is pick it up and read it, asking the Holy Spirit to work and weave the words into our hearts and minds.
A friend told me years ago that when we have to rip out stitches..it builds our character. Spending time with the Lord in His Word when life is unraveling..well, that's where true character is formed. Building everyday on God's Word makes our charcater stronger and sronger...and then we are less apt to throw in the towel when the hard times come.
Have a blessed day!
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
" Be an encourager, a healer, one who helps restore the years the locust has eaten"
~Dr. David Jeremiah~
"I will restore to you the years the swarming locus has taken," says the Lord in Joel 2:25.
Oh, there are so many people out there that have been victims of what the locust has taken from them. Our Lord, is the Restorer of the lives that have been affected.
WE all can be an encourager. It would be our part of their healing process to encourage them. Our lives get busier and busier, and unless we make a conscious effort to have eyes that see and ears that hear the needs around us, how will we know how it is we can encourage them?
Are you someone that is in that place of needed encouragement? Have the locus been brutal through the years? With a Lord that loves you and wants to restore you..and a Lord that will provide the encourager's that you need, it won't be long before those years are just a memory.
And for those of us not in that place right now, let's all look for ways to encourage others. Amen?
Let's all be who God wants us to be and doing what He wants us to do....being an instrument of encouragement to those who need it.
Thursday, February 18, 2010
~Streams In The Desert~
That was a long time ago, but if I could change one thing, it would be that I would soak myself in the Word yielding myself to the deeper work God wanted to do. I didn't fall away spiritually, I just didn't let the healing balm of Jesus comfort me. All I could think of was how much I hurt and wanting it to go away.
The deeper work was done. I let the chisel do its work and there was healing. Sometimes those deeper works can't be put into words because they are so profound in your heart. That was one of those times. I might have delayed the healing, but healing eventually came. The Father was waiting for me to trust Him....if you find yourself in this place today, won't you trust Him to use His chisel to shape you for eternity? The longer we put it off and push the instrument away, the more there will be to be chiseled and the longer it will take to heal.. Start the process...surrender.
" My heart trusts in Him and I am helped."
That one sentence holds a lot of wisdom and can be used in every area of our married life. How could this practically be applied? For me it was important to be at home. The more I stayed at home and took care of necessary things, the happier my home was. Oh, don't get me wrong, I am a people person and I thrive on fellowship with other women. Having girl friends makes me a better person all the way around. But my theory was, if I was going to be a stay at home wife/ mother then I needed to be the best one I could be. For me, that was staying home long enough to take care of home matters. It meant taking care of my home.
* Consider his needs.
* Be a keeper of his home.
* Don't over extend yourself outside the home or to outside commitments.
* Cook for him. Learn how if you don't know how.
* Work with him, not against him with money issues.
* Make him the most important person in your life.
* Smile at him. (o:
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
There always seems to be some kind of difficultly going on in our lives. Sometimes they are small petty things..other times they seem to take over our lives and seem overwhelming. Those same difficulties that trouble our hearts are the very things, that if we choose to go down the right path, will teach us wisdom. How do we obtain wisdom? By walking through the difficulties in our lives, with our hearts teachable, asking for wisdom for each situation and then allowing God to do the hard thing with us. Surrender.
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
God does want to bless us in small things and big things. No, I am not in to the the Prosperity Doctrine way of thinking. Just like we like to bless our children, the Father wants to bless us. For Christmas I made my son a crocheted afghan. He wanted one and had hinted for a couple years. I was having such a hard time with one of my hands I didn't think I would be able to do it. But I really wanted to make one for him because I knew it would bless him. I started on it a year ago right after Christmas 2008. I did a row at a time so as not to tear up my tendons, which I did a few times. Well, I finished it and he loved it. He was blessed and I was too, knowing he was.
So, last week my daughter and I were dropping some things off at The Salvation Army and decided we would walk around and see if there was anything that caught our eye. I walked back towards the blankets and bedding..I didn't need any so why I even walked back there was beyond me. There is was, my eyes went right to it..a crocheted afghan the same ripple pattern that I made my son, but it was aqua. I grabbed that thing before anyone else saw it! I checked it over and it looked like it was just made. The workmanship was beautiful....then I saw another little crocheted blanket as well. I smiled all the way to the cash register only to find out everything that day was half price! I got it for $2.50 I hardly ever find deals like this..but this day, in this way, God wanted to bless me.
Last week a man came to my door to see if we wanted him to cut up and haul away the branches that we had on our side yard. He wanted $100. My husband had cut them and it became too big of a task and he was whittling away at it a little at a time. It was going to take weeks. Two days later another man came to the door...he wanted $150. geesh. Saturday my husband was out snipping away at these branches and a man came and asked did he want help? He wanted $40.
What a blessing that was to have this man and his son cut these branches up and haul them away. We looked at it as a blessing from the Lord.
We aren't LUCKY...we are blessed! Everyday even in little ways, God wants to bless us. We are His children. Just like we like to bless our children, so does He. We have to see the every day things that happen in our lives as blessings. Then, we have to acknowledge them as such with grateful hearts and words of thanksgiving. Look for His every day blessings in your life today...you'll be amazed!
Monday, January 18, 2010
I was thinking this morning as I read this verse how we talk to one another really gives a glimpse of how we feel on the inside. As I have been out and about, I have observed this verse in action. The way people talk to one another these days shows such a lack of respect for one another. Sometimes there isn't much of a difference between Christians and Non Christians on how we respond in conversations. In the age of Facebook, Twitter, texting...and whatever else is out there, we aren't only speaking rudeness, but we're writing it too.
Verse 36 of this same chapter, Jesus says we will give an account on judgement day for every idle word we speak. OUCH! That the words we say now will reflect our fate then, either we will be justified by them or will be condemned. Whoa, that is serious stuff concerning what we say.
We can say what sounds to be the right thing to say, but when the motive of our hearts is unpure and manipulating....well, that's what's springing up from our heart. It's scary to think that the more we talk, that much more of our hearts are revealed.
"The heart of a fool is in his mouth, but the heart of a wise man is in his heart."
I challenge us all to choose our words wisely and kindly...but more so..make sure our hearts are aligned with God and we won't have a problem with what we say...SELAH
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Monday, January 11, 2010
My husband was off the first ten days of the new year so I didn't have a lot of time to think about what I would like to do with this new year ahead. One of the things that I do want to do more of is scrap book journaling.
This kind of journaling is different than most journals as it is made up of clippings of my favorite things from magazines or just pretty stuff that I enjoy. Journaling this way gives me a chance to be creative and journal all at the same time...for little money. Regular scrap booking supplies can be costly. I buy sketch books at Aaron Bros. The paper is heavy enough to glue pictures and write on. I got mine on sale for $12.00.
I thought I would share with you this morning one of the things that I hope to incorporate more of in my days in this new year...more thoughts later..have a blessed day!
Sunday, January 3, 2010
We started the day going to church together and going to Sunday brunch at a Southern California Mission. It was warm and sunny and we ate out on the patio. We have gone here before for other family milestones, including each our children's 21st birthdays. It was a special way to spend the day and both of us wouldn't of wanted anything more.
All of a sudden I don't feel very young....you can't be married 40 years and be young! That's okay, it's been a wonderful forty years filled with many of life's challenges. Whatever those things were, we took them hand in hand and walked them with the Lord as our guide.
Now what? I look forward to walking with this man for as many years as the Lord will give us.
Forty years was a big milestone. One lady asked me today, "Forty years with the same man?" Yep, forty years with the same man...and as many more that the Lord will give me.
Thanks to our children for making our day special and to my husband who makes me feel special every single day when he looks at me!
Thursday, December 31, 2009
"...He remains faithful..."
2 Timothy 2:13
Whatever the Lord places in each of our hands this year, one hand should be open in trust to the One who loves us most. In the other hand, let's embrace the gift of His faithfulness, grace and mercy.
These gift are ours because they were bought and paid for by the precious blood of Christ. Will it be this decade, this year, this day that He will return for us? We can look forward with much anticipation to all the things God will do for us and in us because of His faithfulness.
God bless you, dear friends, may He bless your New Year!
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
When the holidays are over sometimes we look back with such agony and grief that we didn't make room for Jesus. We bring Him into our Christmas by having mangers and stables in our homes and on our lawns, we wear lapel pins that say Jesus is The Reason for the Season, we sing songs about the birth, so yes, we bring Christ into our Christmas. The grief comes when we didn't make room for Him. We brought Him into Christmas, but in all reality we didn't make room for Him. The days flew by and one day could lead to another, and another, and maybe we found ourselves being spiritually starved for spiritual food.
There were some Christmases that I was so grieved that everything came before spending time with Jesus, that my heart just ached. I failed to make room for Him.
If that's what happened to you this Christmas..there was no room for Jesus...don't lose heart and let the Enemy of your soul beat you down. We are supposed to make room for Jesus every day of the year. Everyday is a fresh start and His mercies are new every morning. if we make a commitment to make room for Jesus now...well, next Christmas He will already have his bags unpacked and settled in to a heart that made room for Him!
Just a thought...If you have to, leave a small manger up as a reminder all year long..to make room for Jesus.
Monday, October 19, 2009
From the back cover;
Come dance with Me..
A close relationship with God is not just a walk, it is a dance of the heart as you keep in step with the Lord. Many people search for religion, but God desires relationship; many people want to do but God emphasizes that His people should be. (Italics mine.)
- Discover why God called David the man after His own heart.
- Find out why God allowed Moses to speak with him face to face.
- Lean about God's heart of love for the people of Israel.
- Reflect on the relationships Old Testament prophets had with God.
A Heart That Dances will take you on a great adventure of intimacy with God. You will experience the firsthand joy of life with the Lord and the celebration it truly is.I am really glad that I did this study. I found myself truly wanting to dance with the Father as I drew closer and closer to Him.
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
"Nothing happens by happenstance.
I was sharing with a friend the other day that the trial she was going through has come as no surprise to God. Sometimes those things come into our lives that almost suck the very life from us. It has been my experience that those very things can draw me closer to God and if I abide in Him and surrender to His will, a deeper work will be done in me. The work that was done that took me deeper and deeper with Him, wasn't anything I could put into words. It wasn't anything that I could teach on or write about or even explain...it was a hidden work of the Spirit. Oh, the change is there and people will see it, but yet they won't be able to put their finger on what it is.
Nothing happens to us by happenstance. Our Father is on His Throne and he has all authority over all things. What comfort that brings us in a world full of chaos and uncertainty.
"...If God be for us, who can be against us."
Monday, October 12, 2009
For months and months I felt this dark cloud over my head. I don't know why. I couldn't hear God. I know that He never leaves us, but I couldn't feel His presence or hear His voice. I was in the Word, going to church, having fellowship...yet, this overwhelming sense of sadness just seemed to over take me at times. I know that living with chronic illnesses can do that at times. I have lived with these chronic illnesses for 18 years and every day it is a challenge to do what is before me. I know some of you know what I am talking about. Each day God gave me what it was I had need of. I may not have accomplished my agenda for the day, but I did get up each day and took care of the needs of my husband.
It didn't help at all to record breaking heat for weeks and weeks..it seemed like the hottest summer that I can remember. I am so thankful for air conditioning...but I did start to feel really closed in as the days went by. At the same time, there were the fires that were burning out of control and it always leaves you with a sense of where will it be next.
I have been to the doctor for the weirdest things the last four months..and a dentist appointment that went bad and found myself sitting in the chair for eight hours...not good for a fibromyalgia body. It took days to recover.
We have had extended family drama, the kind that cuts to your very heart. It's not behind us yet, maybe it never will be. The enemy would like nothing better. The enemy must be laughing his head off thinking, "This is a Christian Family." Some of us are walking with integrity.. some are playing right into his hands and are not. So sad. This has taken a toll on my physical health, stress usually does.
Well, I gave you the tip of the iceberg of the happenings around me...there is so much more...but today is a new day and it feels good just to be able to come here and say hello and share my heart.
I love the picture of this leaf at the top of this post...it reminds me that we are to stand out in a world of grey.
Today is a new day! Thank you to all of you who left me comments and sent emails inquiring about me. It encouraged me so much. There can be joy in the journey, because God is so faithful!
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Yes, I am alive. The other day someone was talking to my daughter and said they still saw my husband out walking, but what happened to the beautiful dog he walked with. She told them the dog was put down two years ago..then he asked..." Is your Mom alive or dead." Whoa..that made me feel kind of weird. Maybe he thought I walked with my husband..I never have. His legs are a foot longer than mine and I could never keep up with him. He also walks at 5:45 and I am still trying to figure out that time of day if I am still alive.
I am alive, but I haven't felt well this last month...okay, longer than that. I won't whine and tell you the details. I am on the mend, I think...
I got to thinking my blogging friends might wonder if I was alive too. I am posting today with hopes of posting again really soon. I want to tell you about a bible study that I have been doing this summer. I have really been blessed doing it.
It's sooo hot here. It seems to me to be one of the hottest summers for me. I don't know how all of you who live with humidity do it. My hair hasn't looked good since April.
I'll close for now and tell you all that I will be back, hopefully in the next few days!
Thursday, July 23, 2009
I was weary and tired as our vacation time approached. It had been a busy year and especially the last few months with health issues and busyness in our Women's Ministry at church. Busier actually, than I had been in years. I was so looking forward to relaxing and all of us being together making new memories.
I had to make trip to urgent care two nights before we left with an ear infection. It seems every time we go away together I get sick..so I was a little discouraged. I have learned to roll with the punches but I was blind sighted the first day we arrived when my foot froze up and I could barely put any weight on it. This happens periodically, but it hadn't happened for awhile.
The drive takes 4-5 hours depending what the traffic is like in Los Angeles. On the drive up to Pismo, I said to my husband, " I have an assignment for us while we are gone. Let's look for glimpses of God's glory this week." So we talked a little bit about it and several times during the first day my husband asked, "Any glimpses?" I would just smile... not yet.
Here I was at a beautiful stretch of California coastline.....I saw dolphins, sea lions and I think I spotted a whale one day...reflections of the sun through evening fog coming in...rolling hills of Vineyards...the majesty of my Creator was all around me. Nothing wowed me as a glimpse of His glory. I guess what I wanted was....Oh my goodness, would you look at that! I would sit on the balcony of our room looking out over the ocean..just saying to God, " Show me Yourself in a special way." Here I was soaking in all the beauty and fresh air and yet I didn't feel I'd seen anything I was looking for. I have never been one to look for the big hype or emotionalism of Christianity and I still wasn't.
Please don't take me wrong I did praise God while I was there for His beautiful creation and the blessing to be able to come one more time with my family...I did worship Him and praise Him!
That's what I saw one day last week..glimpses of His Glory through my family! Pretty cool stuff.